I’m just going to cut to the chase, I really hate running. It has always been the absolute worst thing for me to do EVER. If anyone mentioned going for a run, I’d be out of there in a heartbeat! I used to tell people that my tears were just sweat droplets. Obviously they weren’t. Running is hard, man.
My parents made me go out for Cross Country and Track/Field in high school yah know, so I stayed in shape. Needless to say, that day started my streak of dreading getting out of school. Every. Single. Day. I felt like a hamster on a spinning wheel, never being allowed to stop. I think you’re getting the point of my absolute disgust for running. Well people prepare to be shocked! Let the torture ensue. (Okay it’s really not THAT bad) Nah, it totally is.
After years of only seeing running as complete and utter agony, I have decided to give this cruel act a second chance. The amount of time that it takes me to make excuses to not do it is the same amount of time that I could have run, and already been done for the day. It’s really only a good 35-45 minutes out of the day, I’ll be fine. I’m so over my mindset that everything is the end of the world. Because here I am, still very much alive after running 3.5 miles today. OH THE HORROR. The main problem is that it’s all in my mind, but it’s very hard for me to get past that. My mind is telling mr that I can’t when I already know my body is capable of so much more.
So there I was, staring down the all too familiar Trail that I had unknowingly created to be my personal Hell. I felt the wind on my face as a shiver ran down my back. “Why are you doing this to yourself?” I thought to myself as I began to stretch. “Because running is hard, but it gets the fastest results. Duh!” I answered myself flippantly. Yes, when I get stressed, I talk to myself. Don’t pretend that you haven’t done the EXACT same thing! Anyways, so I shoved my earplugs into my ears and began my trek. At first I was fine for maybe the first 10-15 minutes. I couldn’t believe that I was actually keeping up with Sean, which NEVER happens. Yeah well that didn’t last long. Suddenly I felt like I was dying, my legs did not want to go a step further. I stopped and had to walk for a bit. This only happened two times during my run THANK THE LORD. I would’ve felt even more pathetic had I stopped in addition to the two times. I watched in misery as Sean ran circles around me.
At the end of our runs, we always sprint the last half-mile. I began to pick up the pace and my legs felt like they were on fire. Sean had said that we were just sprinting around the corner. Well I took that as we were sprinting until we reached the car. Literally returning to the age of a five-year-old, I began screaming at him informing him that he had lied to me about where we would be running to. I did this all while sprinting I might add. It even amazes me at the amount of energy I seem to have. Turns out we were only sprinting to the mile marker. I hung my head in shame as I apologized profusely for yelling at Sean, after taking at least five minutes to regulate my breathing and trying not to vomit, of course. I ended that run simply trying not to puke out all of the water that I had attempted to quickly consume right beforehand. Not wise people, not wise at all.
I feel that this is all very philosophical for my life too. I am a person that has almost always done the bare minimum. I always got everything handed to me. I am a being that typically relies on instant gratification. I only ever went above and beyond if it was something that I actually had interest in. As I’ve gotten older, I’m quickly realizing that it’s a pretty difficult mindset to break. And I’m not alone. But, in a weird way, I feel that running is going to provide a helping hand in all of that. Because running is HARD and It’s actually good to do hard things.