The Beauty In The Chaos

September 18, 2026

by Shelley

This past month has been a roller coaster of emotions. Honestly, in every area of my life, it felt like something was going on. Boy, oh boy…when you pray for something, you better be ready when God starts answering.

Today, though? Today was just one of those days.

By 7 p.m. what I lovingly call the “wind up before the wind down” hour…my son was dressed as Superman, a firefighter, and somehow a samurai fighter all at once. And, of course, he was fully committed to playing the part of all three.

Meanwhile, I was hiding in a corner trying not to share the last brownie I had been thinking about all day.

He found me. He always does.

So, in typical mom fashion, I shared half of my brownie with my samurai-firefighter-superhero and accepted that nothing in this house is ever truly mine.

The day had actually started off okay. I loaded up the car, my son was as sweet as pie, and we stopped at the store to get a toy. I had even checked ahead of time to make sure the toy was in stock.

Except it wasn’t.

If you’ve ever raised a three-year-old boy, you already know that kind of disappointment is NOT how you want to start your day. Immediate damage control….and apparently that became the theme for the rest of it.

My daughter had a hiccup at the store, lost her keys, and then realized she had forgotten a bra before work. So there I was: finding the keys, handing over my bra, and putting out emotional fires everywhere I turned.

Motherhood, am I right?

By the time I finally made it home, I was emotionally drained. I crawled into bed and tried to find some kind of beauty in such a chaotic day.

It had been a day when trauma fueled more of my responses than I would like to admit. A day that revealed there are still areas inside me that need some serious work.

Then I realized….that WAS the beauty in the day.

Self-reflection.

Recognizing that I made it through the chaos while also being honest enough to see that I still have healing to do. I’m human. I’m not perfect by any means, and apparently healing isn’t something we finish and neatly check off a list. Sometimes it looks like realizing, after the fact, that an old wound was speaking for us.

But there is Someone who loves me more than I could ever imagine. God pours that love into me during every second and every chaotic moment of every day.

It’s His grace that keeps me going.

His love that keeps me going.

His mercy that keeps me going.

And listen….the day wasn’t all emotional damage control and stolen brownies. I also got to do a quick photo shoot with Sean and Karina from Leviticus Fashions AND came home with a loaf of sourdough bread.

That’s a win, okay?

So, from one forgiven and still-healing human to another: keep growing. Keep healing. Keep looking honestly at the parts of yourself that still need work. Most importantly, keep trusting that God is going to love you through every bit of it anyway.

Keep looking up! John 10:10

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